How to be less judgemental; psychologist suggests 9 ways

We all are guilty of judging others at some point or the other considering it’s a natural tendency for a human to do so. It is practically impossible to not judge something or somebody because depending on our personalities, backgrounds, and thought patterns, our mind will always be keen on putting the label of good or bad, ‘my-type’ or ‘not-my-type’. But if judging evokes negative or hostile emotions, it is best to assess a situation objectively. (Also read: Top signs of a narcissist and how to deal with them)

Nedra Glover Tawwab, Therapist, NYT Bestselling Author, Relationship & Boundaries Expert says, “To some extent, most of us judge others. However, it still helps to be less judgemental. Judgments are a way to mark things, people, and thoughts as good or bad. There’s more to us and others than what appears on the surface.”

Tawaab says judging is often a way that people respond to differences and judgment is a way that people try to control others. “People are not all the same. It’s okay to be different (except when those differences are harmful to others),” says the therapist, advising people to practice tolerance and acceptance.

She however says one does not need to accept any harmful or dangerous behaviours.

Nedra Glover Tawwab suggests 9 ways we can be less judgemental:

– Accept this that people are not perfect. And that also includes us. If keep this factor in mind and remember that even we are not perfect, we could probably be less judgemental.

– Embrace this that people think differently than you: Every individual is unique and are coming from a different background. Being tolerant to them and accept them for who they are could be helpful.

– Practice self-compassion for yourself: It is important to not judge yourself too.

– Practice compassion for others: Making this a habit could bring in a lot of positivity.

– Step outside of your comfort zone by being around people who are different from you. This would make you more accepting.

– Stop making statements like “If that were me…” and “I would never…” Stop making such comparisons.

– Stop using yourself as an example for how others should behave.

– Remember this that you’re not always right.

– Consider the whole person, not just the part of them you’re judging.